Mom seeks understanding among autistic kids' peers Face painter plans to spread word at Old Bridge Day Sept. 29 BY JESSICA SMITH Staff Writer Tammy Cedar, of Old Bridge, takes a break from a recent face-painting gig for a photo with her son, Evan, 5. Tammy is seeking to raise awareness of the need for children to be knowledgeable and understanding of peers with autism. OLD BRIDGE - For a parent, sending a child off to kindergarten can be a trying time. Thoughts and worries over whether the child will adjust, succeed and be able to form friendships can be overwhelming. As township resident Tammy Cedar knows, the concerns are multiplied for parents of children with autism. "My heart breaks into a million pieces when a child approaches my son, and because he doesn't have the same conversational skills, the child just walks away," Tammy said. Five-year-old Evan Cedar was diagnosed with autism at age 2. Since then, Tammy and her husband, Neil, have watched Evan make great strides of progress with his condition through behavioral, speech and occupational therapies. "At one point, he was nonverbal, and now he's in an inclusive setting," Tammy said. Evan goes to school for a full day, split between a therapeutic setting and kindergarten class at the Walter M. Schirra Elementary School. "So far, it's been great," Tammy said. Though the therapies have proved to be helpful, their cost is difficult to manage, ranging from $85 to $150 for a 45-minute to an hour session. These therapies, not covered by the Cedars' insurance, and multiplied by several times a week, put a strain on the family's finances. Tammy, whose full-time job was caring for Evan, got her imaginative juices flowing about two years ago to create Fantasy Faces, a face-painting business that would supplement the family's income. "I've always been artistic, creative and crafty," Tammy said. "It has been very successful. I'm pretty sought-after now." After trying out her face-painting talent at a friend's son's birthday party, Tammy began booking parties on weekends, when Neil was off from his job in Manhattan as an audio engineer and could care for Evan. Along with the children's parties, Tammy does festivals and fairs, and even corporate events and nightclubs, where she does full-body painting for adults. One event, however, stands out for Tammy. "Old Bridge Day is just something that's kind of personal and close to my heart, because I live here," Tammy said. This year's festival, on Sept. 29, will be Tammy's third time participating at Old Bridge Day, and she is planning to do something different. Along with her usual face-painting fun, she will be working to promote autism awareness among children. Tammy will distribute literature she created that explains autism in terms youngsters can easily understand. A flier titled "The Weird Kid" is written from the point of view of a child with autism who is asking peers for patience and understanding. "You don't have to be my friend, or even understand me," the flier states, after discussing possible differences of a child with autism. "Just please, don't be mean to me." Tammy said she is hoping children and their parents will take the time to read her literature, and maybe gain a better understanding of the neurological disorder. As kids learn more about autism, she said, there is a better chance that they will be kinder to their peers who are affected by it. In order to give the children at Old Bridge Day that extra, oft-needed incentive to read the materials, Tammy is holding a contest. She will give out sheets of paper with the autism ribbon printed on them to all children who wish to enter. The child who does the best job coloring the ribbon and writing a paragraph about what they have learned about autism will win a free birthday party from Fantasy Faces, with face painting for up to 15 kids. Fantasy Faces offers its services to children with special needs, and Tammy has firsthand experience that makes her sensitive to the needs of the kids. "A lot of these kids have sensitivity to textile things, sensory issues," Tammy said. "It's not always easy to find an entertainer who is understanding." According to Tammy, one of her major challenges with Evan has been his sensitivity to certain sounds. During activities that are typically considered fun, like parties, holiday gatherings and performances, Evan has faced difficulties, she said. While in some ways Evan is different from his peers, in others he is just like them. He enjoys board games like Candyland and Chutes and Ladders, and he loves taking trips to the beach and the park. "He's a whiz on the computer," Tammy said. "He's a very intelligent child." Though Tammy wants the public to receive more education on autism, she does find encouragement in the community. "You can't drive a mile on Route 9 without seeing three or four autism awareness ribbons on cars," Tammy said. Perhaps over the years as Evan continues to grow through his schooling and therapy, public awareness will also expand. Tammy, for one, will be doing her part. For more information or to book a party with Fantasy Faces, visit www.fantasyfaces. net, or call Tammy at (908) 616- 1524.